As I look back on my life, I think of 20 years ago this month. I thought my life had come to an end. My husband of 32 years was dying in Victoria Hospital and here I was in Gatehouse Church worshipping God, my heart breaking.
Perhaps that’s where you are today, your husband isn’t dying but because of circumstances of life your heart is breaking and you feel you’ll never smile or laugh again. In fact when people are happy, laughing, enjoying life – inside you feel annoyed at them, yet you feel ashamed about how you feel – but it’s OK.
I am writing this to tell you it does get better. God does have a plan and right now for you these are just words, but I tell you, hang on to your faith by your finger tips. Keep getting ready and coming to church, cry, but sing praise through the tears. Get up each day and read your Bible. Oh it may not make any sense and you won’t remember what you read, but do it anyway, talk to your Heavenly Father and tell Him how it hurts and cry some more. In time Jesus, by His Spirit will minister to the hurt, guide you into that plan, but in the mean time, be kind to yourself.
Today I thank God because I have walked where you are walking right now. I can tell you there is hope and He is called Jesus. He is not a religion, He is a person who understands, shares your grief and will restore if you let Him.
Can I leave you with my favourite scripture:
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.Romans 8:28
Hang in there, look to Jesus and one day you will see that He will, and has restored, transformed and given you back your life.
Valerie Ann Fraser